When you are older and things go wrong in life,

You get up faster, you become stronger, you accept the reality easier. 

Which is a good thing. 

At the same time, though, 

The pain feels familiar like an old friend, in a lesser degree, yet it makes you numb. 

When 10 out of 10 goes wrong, what are the odds of the 11th to be right? 

So you lose hope. You roll your eyes. You smirk. You laugh this cruel laugh. You disregard it completely. 

The word “cynical” seems to be written with permanent ink on your bones, down your spines. 

It’s just another kind of screwups, what makes it different from others? 

So you shrug. 


You know life goes on, and the world never stops because one person is missing. You do things, you keep doing things, you discover happiness in many other places. It gets easier now to replace someone by doing something else, or even meeting new people. 

You live in the reality. In the present. Your head is no longer stuck in the past, like it once was in your youth. 

You move on. 

Yet at the same time, you no longer feel the depth of emotion when things go wrong as if your whole life could collapse, like in your youth. 

Nothing feels intense. Broken-hearted songs start to lose its meanings. 

Is this what maturity all about?

You become desensitized, by the flavor of life. 


One Reply to “Desensitized?”

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