Why can’t we just be nice to each other?

I’m going to try and keep this short because dwelling on negativity really doesn’t make my life get any better. 

But seriously, I really don’t understand why nowadays, on social media, there is so much hostility and hatred toward people you have never even met. AKA. total strangers. Many people make mean, rude comments, and sneer at one another, at “strangers”

It had never been easier in this day and age to unfriend, unfollow, block, or just simply walk away when you encounter something or someone you strongly dislike. Social media has made ending relationships as fast and painlessly as it could possibly be. 

I mainly use social media to share who I am, what I think, what I do. One thing though, I don’t fake who I am. Another golden rule of mine is, always stay away from other people’s businesses and dramas. I see no point to keep engaging when there is negativity and ill intention. There are millions of things in life to do – many more useful, interesting, and fun things. 

But sometimes hostility from “strangers” came find me, and that boggled my mind. 

I know it’s their problems, it’s not mine. In fact, I try to view these people as they have mental illness; they get joy out of snapping at and being rude to others, just because things are made easier online with no confrontation. They can get away with it very easily, hiding behind their screens. 

What is wrong with being nice to each other, though? I can’t help wondering. This simple social manner and etiquette seem to be ignored easily when it comes to online world. It makes me sad, you guys. But it is what it is. 

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Dear Apple Music, I am so sorry, but I’m still in love with Spotify 

Anyone who follows me on Twitter would see a lot of my tweets on this since I found out Apple Music would be made available in Thailand. Currently I am using Spotify, which is not available in Thailand at the moment. I’m still running on my UK account, paying £5 or around 250 Baht a month (Student deal 50% off FTW). Before I left the UK, I made sure I left some ££ in my bank account to last for about 1 year Spotify premium membership. That’s how much I’m in love with it. 

I am certainly not a techie person, just a streaming music active user, so I genuinely don’t care, be it Spotify or Apple Music or any brand, if it makes things easier for someone like me who

1) can’t live without music 

2) very lazy to download stuff

which is pretty much the reason why I love streaming music service so much. I’m SO glad I got to try Spotify when I arrived in the UK, happily pay 250 Baht every month, and use it ALL the time ever since. 

So, this is why I got super excited when I found out Apple music is here for us in Thailand! This would make my life easier since Spotify is not available yet. Some people and friends tried it and raved how awesome it is. This could be even better than Spotify, I thought, and I could switch it, for only 150 Baht a month too! 

I really wanted to like Apple music from the start!

But…I tried, felt disappointed, and still prefer Spotify. 

Here are the reasons why;

Recommended artists

I can’t believe Apple music doesn’t have this function! To me, this is what makes music- streaming AWESOME as I can explore new and interesting artists so much more. It looks like this on Spotify when you search and click on the artist page. 

  

When you click again, it opens another page which allows you to browse more artists similar to the ones you are listening to much easier. Isn’t it super cool!? 

 
I use this feature to discover new music and artists again and again. As an active user who loves to search for new music to listen, this feature is very important for me.
I feel slightly devastated that Apple music doesn’t have this (!!!!!!) To me, this is almost like the main purpose of using streaming service – to easily and conveniently explore new artists and music. 

Albums & Singles

Spotify neatly separates albums and singles of the artist page in different sections, while Apple music mix all albums and singles together, and I don’t like that at all. 

I probably have a slight OCD for music. When I search for the song, sometimes I want to know what album or single it is that song is from. Apple Music feels too messy for me to navigate, while Spotify albums and singles section is very clean and organized = love from me. 

Curated playlists

Another big deal. This is another thing I love about Spotify; “Browse” and “Discover” menu. Check out how cool it is.  

The playlists on the top keep changing depending on the time of the day you check. So you have “Morning” “Afternoon” “Evening” or “Weekend” playlists and a lot more.

  

Not only you can check playlists easily from Browse menu, Spotify also divides playlists by genres AND moods. I personally love the mood ones. It’s pretty cool as it can match music with your feelings at that moment. 

 
“Discover” section below is great too because it matches your music taste to the ones they wanna recommend, or the ones they think similar to your taste. Spotify really tries to make discovering new music much easier. 

  

I am aware that Apple music has these features too. In fact, I heard some comments about how awesome “For you” feature is. But the design looks very confusing to me as they mix both playlists and albums together, like this.

  

Also, I don’t think “For you” can guess my music taste that accurately. I listen to a wide range of music – alternative/indie, pop, electronic, house, soul, R&B, blues, jazz, pretty much a little bit of everything, so I wish For You layout and design could make navigating through different genres of music easier, if they truly intend it to be music “For me” 

I also checked some of Apple curated playlists and feel that they have much less selection than Spotify. But that’s probably because it is still very new and needs some time to improve the playlists. 

Personally I am not that excited about Beats radio as I tend to go straight and find playlists when I want to listen to something new. 

So, that’s just my opinions and feelings, from a normal user’s experience. 

Most likely I could end up using Apple Music, though, when my ££ in UK bank account is all gone. I truly hope Spotify will be launched in Thailand soon. I really, really do. 

Oh, I almost forgot the only thing that makes Apple Music cooler, Taylor Swift (!!!!!) And I’ve been mainly abusing this by listening to “Bad blood” all weekend. 

#Oops #Confession #GuiltyPleasure 

Life Coach

Hung out with my best friend on Friday night at Wishbeer. Fifteen years of friendship, we have grown and changed so much, but it’s always great to see her. Feels like it’s been a while since we sat down talking and sharing stuff going on in our life at the moment. 

And it’s just great when your best friend casually asks “So what book are you reading at the moment?” 

I don’t get asked that very often (or at all). She knows me, you know. 

He is away, and will most likely be away for almost all of July and a bit of August. Although I miss him and cuddling (TMI? Cuddling IS crucial!), I suppose having plenty of Me time can be amazing too (But I miss him and cuddling…….). I even joke that I’m single for a month, and my friend said, “Get on Tinder”

The modern society of dating and relationship is sad, you guys. Just sad. 

Anyway, back to what I wanted to write. Again I updated my friend about my current issue and told her about all the conversations I’ve had recently about career. And she added some of her opinions and shared some experiences. 

(Sometimes I can’t help but think it’s probably not even worth calling it an issue. My life, in general, is great, and I am thankful for it most of the time. I hardly have to worry about external stuff. This internal thinking process could kill me at times, though. Hence, the “issue”) 

First, I can change and switch jobs and do anything. But it would help a lot if I could determine what exactly it is that I wanna go to. The big picture. The goal. So that it could guide me as a direction. Whatever action I do today, tomorrow, 2 or 5 years from now, I can decide if it is going to contribute to that goal in the end. Sure, the goal can be changed as anything in life. But at least if I have something to look forward to, it would help making these small decisions easier today. 

Second, we don’t lose anything but the time. Time is extremely important. It generates experiences, knowledge, and so much more, and we cannot get it back. If I am going to lose anything today, it is time

Third, she did share her experience with the “Life coach” which is like a consulting service, only it’s not for business, it’s for people. These people don’t really suggest anything, but they help you form and clarify your thoughts in a systematic way by asking a lot of questions in order to help you solve your problem. The session is only 40 minutes, but it can be exhausting as you have to share and think hard about the root of your “issues” and then they would try to analyze it for you. 

Apparently, this life coach thing is common for executives; people who have to constantly make decisions and face issues. One course could cost many hundred thousands of Baht. That is quite a lot, so I asked her if she could contact them and ask if they still need more “samples” as I am interested in trying this, even for a few sessions. 

We’ll see how it goes. 

Whew, my blog always sounds so serious, doesn’t it? This is a place I choose to write inner thoughts and opinions that I don’t get to express in everyday life, though. 

In fact, what I do today, Saturday, is far from anything serious. Spending some quality time with mom feels almost like a privilege these days – I took her to the hospital, did hair and nails together, grocery shopping, and even condo checking (!). She bought me a very nice present, a two-month-in-advance birthday present, and I couldn’t be happier. And we (well, she) talked a lot, just like we did every day when I was in high school. My mom has always been my good friend, except we now get to talk much less than we used to. 

On days like this – ordinary day like this – I feel like life is good, everything is fine, and my issue is so small that just the thought of it even feels ridiculous. 

Sometimes I do feel that there is nothing more beautiful than just simple, ordinary days in life, surrounded by people you love and love you. 

What do you want in life?

Life and career talk on one fine Sunday afternoon at Rocket coffeebar.

I feel incredibly grateful when people who are more experienced than me share some knowledge they know or suggestion. It’s such a valuable experience, because they make you think and question yourself a lot as well as make you feel like you learn something.

Having a mutual connection really helps. It gives you a sort of “friend” feeling, and people are more open and willing to talk. It was the first time we met, and this finance turned businessman apologized he talked too much, usually he doesn’t talk a lot but he thinks it would be helpful if someone told him all these things when he was my age. I kept saying thanks and there is no need to say sorry as I truly appreciate it.

It’s not usual that you meet someone for the first time and go straight into deep conversation about life, career, and future. The whole thing was totally unplanned too! But I also find that when I am open and sincere about my current issues, with the right people, they tend to offer their opinion on the subject back to you.

I decided to do this in bullet point style, just to help me organize my thoughts better. Here are some of the things; suggestion and comments I picked up from today’s conversation.

  • You have to know what you want.

I got asked so many questions in which I can’t answer. Within a few minutes of conversation, he could tell that my problem is not about whether I am happy with my job or not, but it’s that I don’t know what I want.

What do you want to do?

In what industry?

Do you want to work in big corporate, middle company, or small company?

Do you want big money, or nice salary? (Huge difference)

Do you want to live in Thailand or abroad?

Are you willing to put up with long hours?

And the list goes on.

He said he always knows what he wants to do. He prioritized money and was willing to sacrifice job satisfaction, so he was in trading. He then knew he does not want to have a boss, so he declined Goldman Sachs offer. Also, he was willing to take a big risk, so it was ok to make a lot of money, back to 0, and then work his way up to make a huge amount of money by being his own boss, running, and expanding his own business in Southeast Asia.

But not everyone is like that. So first, you need to decide and figure out what you want, what matter to you. 

  • Ask yourself a lot of questions, and put them in “Yes” “No” and “Maybe” categories.

Write them down and divide those questions into different categories; of what you want and don’t want, of what you are and are not willing to sacrifice. Be honest with yourself. That way, you may be able to define what exactly you want in your career.

  • 27 is a critical age.

It’s an age when it’s ok to be confused and think a lot about future career path. “You are still young,” he said (People love to tell me that, huh?). But this could be a turning point that set you in the right direction, if you make a right move.

When you are 33, it’s going to be difficult to change your path and go back as everyone has had 7 years of experience or so. So, right now, at 27, it is good to sit down and contemplate what you want in life as it could have an impact setting future career from now on.

  • Think about how this career is going to help you in the future.

This I have heard many times. You should think about, if/when you quit the company, what can you write in your CV? How much have you learned from this job at this company? But then again, you would know how this job could help you, when you know what you want in your life (Back to number 1 again, huh?)

  • You have a good profile. It’s rare in this country.

Again, within the first hour of conversation, he told me that straight away. He said he is quite sure that I have the ability to pick what company I want to work for, and most companies would want someone like me to work for them, because this kind of profile is rare in Thailand. So I have the advantage to really think hard and choose where I want to go.

When I am surrounded by friends and people whose profile are no different from me, or even way better than me (Finance degree from Cambridge, law degree from Oxford, grad school in Sloane MIT, Kellogg, King’s scholarship, Fullbright scholarship, Erasmus scholarship, Chevening UK scholarship, Monbukagakusho scholarship and blah blah blaaaah, you name it, I know those kinds of people), sometimes I forget that it’s rare and I’ve got the advantage, because I hardly see myself that way. Confession is: I’ve never felt I’m good enough! Too many insecurities can make you focus on what you lack, not what you have, and eventually they make you doubt yourself too much.

  • You look nice too. Use this as your advantage.

Definitely the kind of advice you wouldn’t hear in business school, eh? He said it’s one of the assets I have, consider it as one of my skills, and how I am going to utilize it. Marketing and HR fields are full of women. Instead, go in the field where there are not many women, for example there aren’t many women in investment banking, management consulting or tech industry, so if you could manage to get in, you would get noticed and this could give you an advantage as many workplaces are looking for male/female balance in workforces. We have studied so much about theories and those things about equality, but in the end you can see that we are just human being, prone to irrationality.

Interesting viewpoint for sure. I’m not gonna say I agree or disagree here, I seriously didn’t interpret this in an offensive way either as I was pretty sure there was no such intention. Simply see this as an opinion. To be honest, the longer I work, the more I see people in society really focus heavily on looks, as it is the first thing people see when they meet someone, so they naturally base their assumptions and impression on that.

Not sure if I missed anything else as we were talking a lot. In the end these kinds of comments feel similar to this 7 questions about life purpose article I just read the other week. I wish I got to have conversations like this more often with many more interesting people. It feels rare, and I truly cherish it.

I hate exercise but I do it anyway

Came across this Time article this week; why exercise is a higher priority than my career, and it made me think of myself and my friends. 

It feels a bit surreal that I am writing about exercise. Me!? It’s almost like a sick joke. I’ve always hated exercise, and tried my best to avoid it. It’s never fun for me. 

I’d rather sit and drink hot latte and read magazines. And eat cheeseburgers. You get the idea. 

I only started going to the gym regularly 2-3 years ago. What drove that decision was mainly because I broke things off with a guy (Don’t roll your eyes, I know I’m a cliche). And I wanted to be a better me; healthier, prettier, and smarter. 

So, signing up for a gym membership and an intro to accounting class were the choices I made, to achieve a healthier-and-smarter-me goal. 

(Still regret the latter one, accounting WTF? but oh well) 

I could keep that routine going for about 6 months before I left for the UK. In the UK I did nothing. Signed up for contemporary jazz dance class for one semester, but couldn’t even drag my ass out of my flat during winter to go to the class weekly (obviously too busy hibernating in my room with a heater). 

I’ve recently started exercising only 4 months ago. Back to Bangkok, starting office life, and easing myself into routine, it makes sense to be committed to it again this time. 

I only picked hot yoga because there is the hot yoga studio in my office building. Convenience is one of the key factors I consider for exercise. Also discipline. So I usually have fixed Yoga dates of the week and try to stick to it. I find these two factors help making exercise less painful by reducing the amount of time to think and hesitate. Just grab my bag and press elevator down a few floors, on designated dates of the week. 

I still hate it and doubt if there will come a day I like exercising. Most of the time it’s incredibly hard convincing myself to go for 90 minute hot yoga in the evening after a whole day at work, especially on stressful days (Again I’d rather eat cheeseburgers…). 

After I do it though, it feels really amazing every time. Exhausting, but refreshing. Especially at the end of yoga with the dead body pose, you have to lie still and rest for a few minutes. After a 90 minute hot yoga with all the sweats, that feeling is pure bliss. It comes quite close (keyword: close) to the feeling of post-orgasm. 

And you’ve got a lot more energy afterwards. 

I’m not a yoga expert or anything and haven’t really read or studied about its benefits much, but one thing I really like about yoga is it feels like you exercise your body and mind at the same time. You have to learn to breathe deeply; inhale, and exhale. 

More often we are told to let go of our worries of the day. Once, a yoga instructor even told us to “surrender” to the yoga mat. 

To me, that is probably the first time someone told me to “surrender” All my life it’s about to keep going, fighting for the best, never give up. 

Yoga does give me another perspective to look at. The different side of it. 

This is something I didn’t expect but picked up by practicing yoga, for only a few times a week. 

Many of my friends seem to be so busy these days. Some are very busy juggling an MBA degree and a full-time job. Some are extremely busy squeezing a full-time job and starting their own business. They say being too busy, trying to do everything, with not much sleep and no exercise makes them feel very exhausted. A friend even said she got so busy that she became disoriented and forgot her meeting or asked for two meeting appointments at the same time. 

I get it that many people my age are probably trying hard to do everything all at once. We are still fairly young, we think we are capable of doing it all.

It might be true, and you may be able to keep it going for 5 or 10 years. I have to quote my dad here as he likes to compare that health is, just like anything else, a resource. If you keep taking advantage of it, depleting all of it, and not sustaining it, one day you will have to pay the price. Probably an expensive price as it is an accumulated result of your habits for the past 5-10 years or perhaps your whole life. 

I’m certainly not a great example of having a healthy lifestyle; eating and exercising. Trust me, I am far away from it. But I do believe in living with balance and no extreme; too much and too little of something is not good. 

For me, moderation seems to be the key. And exercising seems to fit in this picture of “balance” So I *try* 

(Sounds like a Buddhist teaching here! And hey, I don’t know if I believe in karma and reincarnation stuff, but this moderation thing sounds pretty cool to me) 

This blog post could be a result of guilt as I skipped yoga today. Aim to go tomorrow instead though! 10AM on Sunday morning is going to be painful, but it’s going to be worth it, like I feel it is every time at the end of 90 minutes. 

Are you chic enough to live in Bangkok?

It’s Sunday, and I chose to stay home all day reading fashion magazine (Cleo. I even subscribe it!), articles from Twitter (read tons of good ones today!), and a new novel, as well as chatting with my mom and brother, and cleaning hair brushes and make-up sponges.

Not exactly an Instagram worthy kind of day. 

Earlier my friend and I agreed to cancel our plan to go cafe-ing in Asoke, with the reason that we are too lazy to leave our houses. 

It made me feel I’m getting old, when staying home feels more luxurious than going to brunch in a cool cafe. 

Damn, didn’t I just miss the opportunity to Instagram my hot latte and Eggs Benedict!? Such a big deal, isn’t it? 

I sometimes sneer at and/or make fun of those Bangkokians posting photos of cool restaurants, new bars and chic cafes in town as pretentious; trying to let the world know what a chic, hip lifestyle they possess. Showing off is such a crucial part of Thai society these days. You need to show the world via all possible social media channels that you are always busy, doing interesting stuff all the time, especially in your free time at the newest hangouts in town. 

It’s almost impossible to avoid social media these days, as it creeps into our lives so much that it has become another important part of it. We get bombarded by it seeing what our “friends” (HUGE quotation mark here) are up to daily, hence it most likely has enough power to force us to do the same things. 

Ironically, I’m probably one of them too (HA), although I don’t think I’m the type that tries too hard. 

Since I started working, I somehow enjoy exploring new places to go, much more than when I was in Chula, with limited amount of money (student’s life), but a huge amount of homework, reports, lessons to review on weekends, and no time to chill (Weekends always made me stressed) 

Also I stopped hating Bangkok and enjoying living in my city more. Aren’t we great at producing more and more new places to eat and hang out out in this city!? Feel like a shame if I don’t take an advantage of this fact.

It’s all Sabai-Sabai, and Sanook-Sanook in this city of angel, isn’t it?

(Trying hard not to sneer at that sentence)

Anyway let’s get back to other pretentious people stuff. 

I have learned that some people, or the majority in the society, extremely pay attention to what other people do, where they hang out, what they wear, and some even try to copy the lifestyles that make them look “cool”

Even though that’s not who they are.

I got asked from a friend once, supposedly I don’t like lobster, but if there were a new, chic lobster place open in town, and everyone has been raving about it and going there, would I go there too?

I said no, why would I go if I didn’t like it?

She said, there are people who would go just to make it look good on their Instagram. 

Why?

Seriously, why? 

Some people would be willing to give up who they are, in order to look cool. 

Read that again. Does anyone feel like it’s a big deal as much as I do?

Hello, Welcome to fake society? 

But that’s Bangkok in a nutshell for you, everyone. 

Personally, I admire people who stay true to who they are, even though they are different. 

I have recently spoken to one of my colleagues; a real sweet girl. She likes to read, cook at home, make her own lunch boxes and bring it to the office every day. When I asked what kind of restaurant she likes to go, she said she doesn’t really go out to eat much. She can eat at normal food courts in Big C or Lotus and that would be fine. 

She said, she enjoys simple and basic life. 

That is just so cool. 

The fact that she simply shares that to me and doesn’t fake who she is makes me feel she’s SO much cooler and also braver than those who go out to eat at stuff they don’t even like just for the sake of that damn Instagram. 

I can’t imagine how exhausting it would be trying to fake it and imitate other people’s lifestyles, when you don’t even want it. 

But then again, our modern society is also shaped this way. I can’t count the numbers of times some clients quickly check or even stare at the bag I carry, as if they are ready to estimate my value and net worth, based on that damn bag. 

Materialistic world. No wonder people are trying so hard persuing materialistic things or luxurious lifestyles to make them feel confident and accepted.

I think it can happen when you are insecure of who you are. Therefore, you need this material “stuff” to make you feel better about yourself which you can show off to other people too. 

It’s just sad, you know? Very sad. 

It’s really important to stay who you are, when  society, social media, and peer pressure try to influence and persuade you to be something otherwise. 

I must always remember this. You gotta stay strong. 

Western guys VS. Thai girls (And my view)

Classic, cliché topic isn’t it? 

But today I want to talk (write) about it from my point of view. 

We were at Bellino in Thonglor 13 on Saturday evening. The restaurant/bar was very nice, comfy and cozy. It feels like a hidden spot in the middle of hectic Thonglor. 

Most of the customers we saw that day were mostly Westerners. Many Western guys came with their Thai girls, sitting at their tables next to the bar inside, or at the couch outside. 

I was also with 2 Western guys; my boyfriend and his friend. I walked in, glanced around at all the Farang-Thai couples, and their appearances, atmosphere and everything else hit me like, why oh why, this kind of scene really fits the streotype of Farang guys and Thai girls in Bangkok, or perhaps Thailand in general.

It also seems to be the stereotype from quite a few of my friends; be it in Tokyo, Shanghai, or Bangkok, these white men seem to think it’s so easy, too easy to get Asian girls. I’ve heard it again and again. 

And I can’t resist rolling my eyes. 

I wish I could tell them that, first, these girls who are hunting Farang or desperately want Farang boyfriends are most certainly can’t be used to represent the image of Thai girls in general. 

Isn’t it natural that Farang men would be exposed to the kind of girl that wanna catch them, because they seek for financial security or whatever reason these girls are after? (I’m not judging, if it works out for them, it’s good for both parties) Naturally, these girls would choose to hang out at places they can catch their targets attention.

But that doesn’t mean all Thai girls are that easy to get. 

There are plenty others who are definitely not into Farang, because of language and cultural barrier, or many other different things that could put them off. And they would naturally not be in places these Farang go. 

Even in my circle of friends, which many have studied abroad, are exposed to different cultures, speak 2-3 languages, it still doesn’t mean all of them have positive attitude toward Farang. In fact, quite a few have hostile feelings toward them. 

Then, the conversation shifted to the expat side. I’ve never given much thought about it, but they were talking about how difficult it is for expats in Thailand to find a “good, decent Thai girl.” (Quoted our conversation here. Be noted that the word “good” is subjective) 

Here are the reasons;

1) “Good” Thai girls are taken.

2) “Good” Thai girls don’t go where Farang go. They always hang out in their own group, very secluded in their own circles. Farang can’t get into those circles. 

Some other reasons is, even though there could be many “good, decent Thai girls,” if they have never been exposed to international setting, most of the time there is a huge cultural and communication gap. It is too challenging trying to make the relationship work. The lifestyles between Thais and expats can be hugely different, so it’s difficult to find connection with Thais. 

That makes sense, I guess. 

 I actually dislike it when people say I’m into Farang men. It always reminds me of the “Farang men and Thai girls” stigma that has been around ever since I could remember.  

Honestly and sincerely, I most certainly am not crazy about blonde hair, blue eyes, high nose, long eyelashes (yep…) or whatever the outer appearance is. In fact, I don’t mind where they are from, I even joked with friends that “It’s free trade. All nationalities are welcomed,” if they have what I need in a relationship.

It’s the mindset I’m always looking for, be it Thai or Farang or any nationality. 

Speaking from own experiences, what I can find in Farang, but not in Asian men I’ve met so far, is simply the openmindedness. With Westerners, I can always express my thoughts and feelings much better no matter what they are about, and they tend to accept those differences quite well, unlike Asian men who in general (again from my experiences so far) are more narrow-minded, and think there is a certain pattern or way of how a woman should behave, act, or even think.

That really makes me feel too restricted. I have to fit the role of being a “proper girl”

You drink too much? Some Thai guys would start judging you are the bad ones. You sleep with the guy you date within a few weeks? Pfft, definitely a slut. You go to his house too soon? Come on, why are you such an easy girl?

The list is endless. 

There is always something hidden or expected of you to act like a “good girl” 

With Westerners, I feel I am more accepted as a human being. No jokes. 

I can be who I want, and say what I want. And it’s a good feeling to be just me.  

There are many other qualities as well, like how relationship feels more mature; being able to give each other privacy and space, as well as mutual respect, unlike many Thai relationships I heard about which seem to be crazy on controlling and being jealous to each other. 

Sometimes I think perhaps life could be easier if I loved a Thai-Chinese boy and we were oblivious in our own Thai-Chinese bubble with our families and such. That’s another thing for many Thai-Chinese backgrounds, they don’t really view Farang as rich or desirable number one like some girls in this country may do. 

But I can’t change how I am. For this, I really have to pick what makes me happy.

Somehow, even with cultural and language differences, I have felt more connected to Western men I have dated, than many other Thais who speak the same language and share the same culture with me.